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Though I’m VERY excited to talk about it, I have to also be very careful, to respect my children, and their privacy. I think she was flattered, maybe thought the boy was cute, but she knew she wasn’t up for that, and had an easy fall back of “I’m not allowed to.”In my head, I was kinda like….”well, you could have…” and thought it was sweet, but after thinking about it more, I was very impressed with her for being so mature.
She had told me months later that her friends that “went out” with a boy (mind you, this is 4th grade) it got complicated and awkward, and she felt bad for them.
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Making decisions about teens and dating ahead of time will save some headache in the long run.
I still feel like a teen, and having had the opportunity to teach teens last year and this year in a Bible study class, they have become my favorite people to hang out with. Our family rule is that dating starts at the age of 16. Couples can form as early as elementary school, and though it’s fairly innocent at that age, and definitely not considered “dating” in my mind, it’s one of the things that as parents we can be supportive of it, on the fence, or against it.
I’m so excited to start sharing more thoughts on parenting teens, in a monthly series with a few friends, where they will join me in talking about teen topics, as we share our thoughts/experiences. It’s always been that, they have always known, so that decision was made well in advance. Not sure if it’s because of my chill boys, or because they’ve just always known the family rule. My daughter was “asked out” in 4th grade, and though I thought it was adorable and fairly harmless, she said, “I can’t date til I’m 16” to the boy, and that was that.
He did get asked to a girls choice dance that’s coming up in a few weeks, and I’m excited for him to go out and have fun with friends.
I’m giddy mom that gets so excited about this kind of stuff. Lucky for me, I taught my sons’ peers in class last year, and I can get the scoop on who likes who.
Here’s what gets tricky…in this day and age with texting so much, the art of communication is getting lost, and it seems people aren’t dating as much just for fun.I recognize that a lot of people in this world disagree, but I’m grateful I was raised with this, and I hope my children will do the same.Either way, I will love and support, and encourage them every step of the way.Whenever I hear the Celine Dion song, “Let Me Be the One to Love you More” I think of someone I broke up with in college, that it just wasn’t working out.I cried as I listened to that song over and over, wondering when I’d find my true love.I’ll part with a picture of myself and my teenage boys. I love their goodness, their thoughtfulness, and though they’ve got much learning in the art of communication ahead of them, I know they will figure it out. Dating is an important aspect of life…you gotta do it!As much as I adore them, and secretly wish they don’t grow up and leave me, I want them to spread their wings, and eventually get married, and you can’t do that without dating!Parents may not think they need to think about it until it happens, but as with most instances, if you don’t decide in advance, you might make a stressed out making last minute decisions. I’ve been so excited for years for my kids to grow up to be teenagers, and I’m reveling in this moment.Just like all of the other fun stages of childhood, trying my best to soak it all in….capture it on camera…so I can relive it over and over for years to come. Every parent comes from a different experience and perspective, and I’m anxious to hear what the other ladies share as well.Just one step in the right direction that led me to my husband, the perfect match for me.——Most of what my husband and I have decided when it comes to dating expectations for our kids, stems from our church’s suggestions in what is called The Strength of Youth guidelines.In a nutshell, it’s like a teen guide book on a bunch of topics, outlining suggested behaviors that we believe will guide them to living happy lives.